Friday night presents an opportunity for adventure so I put on my brassy hard-candy self and go out. I am a loud-mouthed ass-kicker and I am drinking to keep up with the boys.

At home I wash my face, pull off my clothes, brutally rid myself of the last three shots of tequila which my body tells me it does not need, slide into bed and into a hard sleep.

The next morning, I see my mouth is red, there is white and red greasepaint on my sleeve. I call my friend on the phone, “I kissed a clown last night!” She laughs and says “Aren’t they all!” and I laugh too, because I know how big a fool I am.