jolie laide

jolie laide

I started this when I lived in Brooklyn and struggled for grace in a city that grants moments of beauty and ugliness breathtakingly close to one another. Now I live in a place where things are a different kind of ugly and the beauty is pedestrian. I struggle with that.


I'm sorry. You were expecting me to come home, and what you got was a ghost.

Trauma is a virus. And when we went to the crash site, it was spreading. People were trying to make sense of what they had seen, the horror they had witnessed and they kept repeating their stories, spreading it further and further.

An airplane crashed into an electrical tower and then smashed into the earth. We were there because we had eight families in the area, we wanted to see if there was any assistance we could provide. My colleagues probably thought the best thing they could do was listen, but I watched them get infected with the trauma until it was all I could do to get them out of there.

They will all do better with professional counseling, all of them. I will not talk about what I saw and what I heard because you do not deserve this illness, not even for a short amount of time.


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